JUST SAY NO TO SHIRTLESS PHOTOS

From my observations, Plentyoffish.com has better rules, but OKCupid has a better selection (when it comes to straight males, anyway).

On POF, shirtless photos are not allowed, which I think is great. HOWEVER, it seems like in spite of this rule there are SO. MANY.

GUYS…DON’T HAVE SHIRTLESS PHOTOS. IT’S SCREAMS “HEY IM SHALLOW. LOOK AT MY HOT BODY. ISN’T IT AWESOME? LADIES LINE UP!” NO NONONONO. It’s even worse when the guy is not even particularly fit. Girls really don’t care if you have a six-to-eight pack. We think differently and aren’t as visual as men. I mean, what kind of self-respecting person has a topless photo of themself online? Also, it’s extra pathetic to have 5 topless photos of you by yourself with the camera in the reflection of your bathroom mirror. You’re trying too hard.

Couldn’t wait to leave the gym to take that photo? Wanted to have your muscle glisten from that fresh sweat?

I repeat: Don’t IM someone only to ask them who you are

If you’re messaging someone new, DON’T ask them who they are. In other words, don’t be like this guy:

GettoRomeo2002 (11:14 PM): 
hay 
sup who r u 

GettoRomeo2002 (11:21 PM): 
??

And I was extra annoyed that he was super serious about his question, too! Take note of whom you add to your buddy lists! It’s a lot more impressive to at least give the impression that you know to whom you’re speaking. It allows for more natural conversation. Anyway, I think the screenname of his gives it away…this conversation was goign to be anything but natural.

Anyway, this entire conversation is the epitome of what NOT to do if you seriously want to make a good impression on a potential mate (hahaha I used a cliche). At times, I doubted that validity of this guy and I try to tell myself he is a troll to preserve some of my faith in the human race.

You know the drill; my personal thoughts are in bold.

LEARN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE

Last night on my blackberry, I had the displeasure of another guy messaging me. From the first IM I knew it’d be bad. His diction, syntax, grammar, and spelling were all shot to hell. I looked at this profile and it wasn’t so bad at first: tall, not bad looking, the right age. Then…I looked at this written part.

Hey was up im lookin for a girl that can keep it real wit me now of days girls can’t keep it real so I want a women that can do so if that’s u hit me up to I can be hard to understand some times but once u get to me know me you will if you put the time in i like to get to know who im dealing wit from the inside and out cuz you don’t fully know someone if you don’t know them from the inside I like girls that that got goals and and don’t give up ez to me that says a lot about someone if you are the type to give up on yourself u must not think highly of yourslef I look at things from all aspects somtimes I over think but its all in good favor even tho it might not look like it at the time this is important to undstand about me Im in too music thing that comes 1st then you sorry that’s the rules I don’t make em I just follow lol anyways if you like what you hear hit me up I don’t be on this site too much I rather talk on the phone or text if you like to email I don’t I have a aim u can also hit me on that sixfoe2006

NO! just NO! WHERE’S THE PUNCTUATION? THAT’S THE LONGEST RUN-ON SENTENCE (IS IT A SENTENCE IF THERE’S NO PERIOD AT THE END?) I’VE SEEN IN MY LIFE. Holy fucking shit. And I have to say you can tell a lot about someone from their profile. His profile says his profession is realism (read:unemployed) and he has been in college (the hell he has). I will make a post in the near future about my red flags. But the fact that that profile was written so poorly…

Oh and now I see at the end he says he’d much rather talk on the phone. Well since I couldn’t understand what he was saying and he couldn’t even explain himself over AIM (“I’m no auther, I’m a man of words” Me, “But you ARE using words on AIM…”) he basically spent the REST OF THE CONVO BEGGING to talk on the phone with me. He used so many excuses and it was just a turn off. I want a man who is smart enough to be able to express how he feels and explain what he’s thinking through written/typed word. I don’t think that’s so much to ask.

Also, spending 30 minutes trying to pressure someone into doing something they clearly don’t want to do during the first convo looks horrible. If you’re going to try to pressure me now when I’m a stranger about something so small, I shudder to imagine what you would try to force me to do if we were closer or in a relationship. No thanks.

He, too, was butthurt. He couldn’t let it go. He couldn’t understand me because he didn’t understand what the words “insolent” or “imprudent” meant and somehow was unable to look up those words even though he was on a computer. He and books (or google) obviously aren’t very well acquainted.

Moral of the post:
Learn English. Try reading a book or opening a dictionary or encyclopedia.
Don’t be surprised when someone from the internet doesn’t want to talk on the phone with you after 3 minutes of online conversation.
Don’t spend time trying to convince someone to talk on the phone with you when you could have just been IMing them the whole time you were complaining.